By Debbie L. Miller
Hi. Name’s Barney. Circus Clown. Yep, I know what you’re thinkin’, “He’s a clown! My God! Is this what my dating life has come to? What’s next, an elephant boy?”
Well, just because I’m a clown doesn’t mean I don’t have aspirations or a plan for my career trajectory. But I’m not gonna give you that bit about this clown thing being a temporary job, something to do while I figure out what I really want to do with my life. It’s not like I’m a Starbuck’s barista who’s really an artist. I’m the real thing.
Yes, Baby. a clown. This is no stopgap gig — it’s who I am. It’s what I’ve wanted to do my entire life and I got my chance, so I went for it. If that’s okay for you, fine. And, if it turns you off and you’d like to sit in silence until the bell rings and you can move on to the next guy, great.
I know who I am and I like me. So, why did I pay $250 for this speed dating session, if I’m so secure? Well, it’s real hard to meet women in my line of work.
Sure, there’s the Bearded Lady in the sideshow, but she’s married, and besides, they’re shutting that down because of protesters who say it’s politically incorrect. Ditto the Fat Lady. Body shaming is not cool. Both of these women are really super nice, but now they’re out of jobs and leaving the city to pursue new careers. That just leaves Alice the Fortune Teller, but between you and me, she’s kind of a drag. She’s always telling me what’s gonna happen and that’s too control-freaky for me. I like spontaneity.
Ding, ding, ding!!!
And, we’re done here.
Next.
